It is in our aloneness within deep abiding silence that we take the final steps into the soul. What precedes this is a painful release of the world an entry into a deep dark core level passage way. Here, a final offering is made. Within this darkness is the release of all that we thought was spiritual, good and righteous; all the ways we have atoned for our karma. There is a welcoming in of all the previous aspects of ourselves who were until now, denied entry. They were judged and deemed bad, improper, distasteful. Now, we are strong and clear enough to accept and allow these aspects of our previous self to come home. Allowing them to fully integrate into our wholeness.
Like when we smoked or did drugs or hit our child or ran away from home. There are also past life aspects that are coming home. Let them all in. Allow the judgments to drop and let them all come home now. They are all just ways in which you played life out previously, that until now you couldn’t accept or unconditionally love. Now, you wouldn’t act the same, but then it may have made perfect sense why you did what you did. These aspects are still a part of the separated state and need forgiveness and acceptance.
So, they start returning and we act weird and strange and some of them are so painful. Remember, some of these parts of our self have been waiting a long time to come back in, to be reunited with the whole, to be forgiven. We can get completely thrown out of time and space and some may even arise from past painful lives that until now you weren’t strong enough to allow. It isn’t necessary to play out these aspects fully. Although you may find yourselves acting out strange behaviors, like smoking or being overtly sexual.
Sometimes there will be pain, excrutiating pain felt, which is residual memories and felt sense experiencing from the time period they arose in. Just allow this pain to pass through. Sometimes our present life gets distorted through these old lenses or filters. Be assured that everything is being choreographed perfectly for this healing to occur and that is always here and you will be more fully aware after these aspects are integrated.
For entry into the soul precludes any ways of being. There must be a final release, a surrender to all the ways that are deemed to be right or wrong. The soul knows no right or wrong…there is a palpable emptiness which permeates soulfulness. I cannot find any better word to describe the flavor of this land. The entry key is complete and utter abandon and release of the world and integration of all the aspects. They must all come home and then there is an entry way, a clear passage to the soul.
Entry into the soul is a descent. It s pervasively free of ‘good’ behavior. There is no mind here and therefore there is no righteously best way to live or to be. There is an arising of love though that begins to soften this experience and bring a warmth and comfort to your frazzled being. It feels like what the snake must feel when he sheds his skins. Only this is a final shedding and brings with it any extremely vulnerable, naked way of being.
There seems to be no need to cover up, but to be carefree about ones nakedness. There is a more pervasive allowing of everything previously deemed wrong or right. The mind is still functioning, but not in the same way. The mind is operating when necessary to provide certain skills, like driving. Otherwise, it is much quieter.
Often times before this soulful entry, there may be feelings of hysteria or of ‘going crazy’, of having a psychic meltdown. So much is breaking down before this entry that the mind itself can no longer interpret what is real any longer. This happens to such a degree that there are periods when only deep abiding surrender of everything we have known must occur. This is the darkest night of the soul. By this stage of release, you have already undergone many dark nights of the soul and are well equipped to circumnavigate this. Often the pain can be so excrutiating that you might take your life if it weren’t for awareness being present witnessing this culmination.
When the soul becomes the primary driver there is an aloneness, yet, there is also a soothing, serenity. There is more flow within what is occurring an allowing of life to be as it is. There is a mystery living through this being. She is quieter and less needy and can fully function in all the ways she use to. There is more simplicity of mind.
Not for the weak or the cowardly this is truly the land of the free and the brave. Once one has walked through the embers of this fire, there is no turning back to a conditioned life. There are no chains that can hold this rebel. For she is free within the blessed home of her soul. Nowhere else does separation finally banish and freedom come pouring in. Nelson Mandela new this freedom. Upon leaving prison, he stated. ‘If I cannot forgive this whole experience, I will never be free.’ He didn’t live long after he was released, but his final years were lived as an example of a man who had forgiven all and was finally released to die a free man.
We are all in the prison of our minds and of all our unhealed, unforgiven past karmic experiences. This actually is a lot of what our minds are made of. The unconscious mind is the composite of all the people, experiences and situations that we have not yet made full peace with. This is what tortures us. It is like a huge filter that we look at life through.
When we are ready, when we have released enough of this heavy burden basket, then we can enter the freedom of the soul. The soul is our final home. There is a feeling of release now. This is a resting place. Relax, rest, breathe deeply…just allowing what is.
in deep peace;